Why Does My Boyfriend Hate Me?

Relationships are hard work. Sometimes they work. And sometimes, they are not as happy as we want them to be. Yes, sometimes, there can be hateful feelings in your romantic relationship. There are many explanations for that. Why does my boyfriend hate me? Have you asked yourself that question? Well, we have the answers.

First, and foremost, we have to mention that human beings are flawed. Our self-esteem often depends on the little things our partner says or does that secretly carry a lot of emotional toll.

Sometimes, your boyfriend might not even realize he is hurting you. Let’s try and answer some of your questions regarding why my boyfriend hates me.

Why He Might Hate You?


All of these relationship problems and relationship issues are possible, viable, and plausible in your romantic relationship. Does your situation fall into any of these?

Mental illness

Mental illness can change people’s attitudes. Does your boyfriend come across as cold, uncaring, and distant? He might be dealing with a mental problem like depression. This can totally change someone’s personality and attitude.

Watch for signs of mental illness in your boyfriend. This might explain his change in behavior. It is not an excuse for the hateful words on his part. But if you are trying to find an explanation for his behavior, this might be it.

It is not your job to save him. Yes, in a healthy relationship, you should try and help him. But he might need therapy or something.

Problems At Work/School

Sometimes, we have issues in other areas of our life. And they affect our healthy relationship. We bring those problems at home. And that is why we take out our angry strong feelings on people we love. Why? Because we expect those people to understand our behavior.

If your guy is unhappy at work, school, or anywhere else, he might have negative emotions and negative feelings. And they have entered your home. Talk to your man if you can help him with anything work-related or school-related.

Or he might have had fights with friends. Anything can be the reason.

He Is Not Happy With Something In The Relationship

Does your boyfriend display signs of problems in the relationship? And he sees you as the problem? There might be something wrong in your relationship and he is mad about it.

Or he might be fearful of the future of your relationship. Sometimes, men display impatience in the relationship through negative emotions. Talk about a situation that might bother him. You definitely don’t want to end up in an abusive relationship.

Are You Clingy Or Overthinking?


We said in the beginning that in most cases, the problem is not with you. There is nothing you might have done to make your boyfriend hate you. But sometimes, if you act clingy or overthinking, you can expect some negative response on his side.

For example, are you clingy if he forgot to text you back? Or did he forget something you told him about your childhood? Do not overthink it.

Do not bother him if he sometimes wants to spend time with friends or alone. It doesn’t mean he hates you. But if you emphasize his going out alone, you might cause an argument later on.

There Is No Trust In Your Relationship

Simply put, relationships are built on trust and communication. And that is not the case with your love story and monogamous relationship. If you have a communication problem, do not be afraid to talk about it.

For starters, it is not a good sign if you have thoughts about your boyfriend hating you.

Signs To Look For


How do you know if your boyfriend hates you? We talked about why my boyfriend hates me as part of the equation. But let’s see what are the signs to look for. If you notice any of these signs of abuse, aggression, or any other form of negative behavior, you should end it.

Fights End With Threats

He ends up in a fight with threatens to leave you, or something even worse. Yes, people fight. And they make up. But there is something when a fight ends up with threats. Usually, no matter how big the fight was, there has to be a resolution. That is how a healthy relationship works.

But if he ends up the fight with threats of breaking up, you should break up first. Do not allow your mental health to suffer because of an abusive boyfriend. There should not be a legitimate reason for him to act this way.

Pulls Away And Hides His Phone From You

Yes, people are entitled to their privacy. We said that any healthy relationship should rely on trust. You have your life and your boyfriend has his. But you should not keep things to yourself.

If he suddenly started hiding his phone and pulls away from you, it is a clear sign things are not working.

Points Your Flaws

There is no better sign than him constantly pointing out your flaws. You are dealing with an abusive partner. And you should not put up with that. At the beginning of your relationship, he loved every single thing about you. He didn’t try to change you. And now, well, it is a different story.

He has things to say about your appearance, personality, and more. No, you are not fat or thin. He is just trying to hurt you. And you should definitely not wear a short dress just because he begged you.

He Doesn’t Want To Do Things Together


When you are in a monogamous relationship, you do things together. But all of a sudden, your boyfriend no longer wants to do things with you. He started avoiding going out together. He bailed on you in all aspects of life.

Your current boyfriend is no longer your game night partner, your partner for a concert, your gym buddy, or your theater buddy. Your significant other has lost interest in you. There is no longer physical intimacy.

Puts You Down In Front Of Friends

Here is another clear sign of abusive behavior. It is one of the most hurtful things he can do. He shows you complete disrespect. And it comes to your shock and devastation.

This emotional abuse is just too much to handle. You might start feeling embarrassed in front of your friends. Stop putting up with that.

The worst thing he can do is post photos with girls as if he is single.

Doesn’t Care About Your Needs

You have come to realize that your loved one can hang out in front of the TV all day long. He can play video games and no matter what you are going through, he doesn’t pause the game or stop doing what he does.

He doesn’t ask if you are okay. Simply put, your boyfriend has stopped showing he cares. It hurts, but that is a sign you should break up. It is the reality you live in. Your boyfriend hates you, so why stay in such a relationship?

Doesn’t Talk About The Future

Up until late, you and your boyfriend talked about the future. But now, he refuses to put that topic on the table. You used to plan on living together, buying a house, and going on a holiday together. And now, it is all gone.

You can sense he is slipping away. Let him go.

He Blames You For Everything

Your man takes zero accountability for the relationship problems in your toxic relationship. You are always in the wrong. That is no way to continue dating someone. He has too much anger for this to work.

What To Do?


This is a no-brainer. Leave. You should treat yourself the way you would like to be treated. And that is not the case with the man you are with. Do not fall into the “he is better than nothing” trap. You can always find a guy who will treat you like shit. But the goal is to find someone who will appreciate you and shower you with love and respect.

Maybe it is time to break up with your current boyfriend and leave the unhealthy relationship.

Written by Steven

Steven is a young student from San Francisco who is obsessed with computers.

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