What Are The Basis In Dating? Baseball Terminology Explained!

When it comes to dating and relationships, we often use slang and funny terms to explain what is happening. Some of the most famous terms we use to explain the progress and development of our relationship have to do with baseball. You know them, first base, second base, and so on. And while they have one meaning in baseball, it is completely different in dating. What are the basis in dating?

Do you know when you have come to first base, second base, third base, or when you got to the home base ?

Before we explain the relationship basis, let’s try and talk a bit about baseball. We are not going to explain the entire game and how it works. But what you need to know is that in baseball, the pitcher throws the player up at bad, who tries to hit the ball. Players score points by making runs. And by that logic, runs happen after running around three bases and returning home.

How does this baseball metaphor translate to dating basis? What are the relationship basis? Let’s try and explain everything.

Understanding Bases

Let’s mention first that these bases can vary among different people. Do not feel embarrassed to ask your friends exactly what they mean when they talk about different relationship bases. The definition of sex is loose, and we all define it differently. Dating bases as well.

With that in mind, let’s talk about a general understanding of basis in dating. What are the basis in dating? Let’s see.

First Base


Basically, it is the first stop in your physical relationship. And what is the starting point for any romantic relationship? Kissing! But it is not just a kiss on the lips. First base is generally more meaningful kissing, such as French kissing.

Or, making out somewhere.

Second Base


This base gets a bit more serious physically. For most people, second base is intimate touching. But it has more to do with where the touching happens. Second base is touching around the waist. And that includes areas such as the breasts and nipples. And most importantly, second base is below clothing.

Third Base


As you move to the next base, you go below the waist. You enter new territory. Third base involves either touching or oral stimulation of the genitals. That includes the penis, vagina, clitoris, and testicles.

Third base is the most controversial. While some view it as just touching, others say that 3rd base is oral pleasure, meaning a blow job or making your girl come by stimulating her vagina.

And it leads to the final stop

Home Base, Or Fourth Base


Some call it home base, others call it fourth base. In any case, the final destination is the same. It is a universal definition. No matter where you stand on the rest of the bases, the final one is sexual intercourse.

We define penetrative sex as genital interaction between both people and is the only act under the home run. If you are a virgin before, you are no longer after getting to fourth base.

Difference Between Major And Minor League Baseball

Fun fact: a lot of people view the American dating basis according to the league of baseball. That is why there are different explanations for second and third base.

Some people think oral sex deserves its own base because it is more than just touching the genitals. In that spirit, some people view first base as a hot makeup session and touching below the clothing. Second base involves touching down low, and the third base is oral sex.

Some relationship experts say that we can clarify the confusion by designating minor and major leagues of play. In that spirit, if you play in the minors, your bases are the ones explained above. But when you enter the major league, you change the definition to first base involving touching and kissing and third base oral sex.

Other baseball terms in dating

Relationship base system is not the only baseball-reference. There are many more in the dating world. Here are some of the more popular.



It sounds familiar and we use it often. In baseball, you get three attempts to hit the ball and advance in the game. And each missed swing is a strike. Three strikes and you are out, meaning your turn at bat is over. And then the next batter comes over.

In the dating world, striking out works a bit differently. In both cases, it means you didn’t reach first base. But in the dating world, you can strike out endless times. There is no three-strike rule.

Switch Hitter Or Playing For Both Teams

In baseball, a switch hitter is someone who bats both right-handed and left-handed. And in the dating world, that is a bisexual person. The term got famous because he plays for both teams. While in baseball a switch-hitter bats only for one team, in dating it is different.


Playing For The Other Team

This term is quite literal and explicit. It is a euphemism explaining that you are gay or lesbian. But as we get broader sexual spectrum, the term has lost its popularity. The spectrum now involves transgender, bisexual, queer, pansexual, intersexual, asexual, and many more.

Grand Slam

In baseball, a grand slam is a home run by the batter. Then, all three bases are loaded or are already occupied with runners. This allows the team to score four full runs thanks to the home run.

And in the dating world, grand slam refers to having anal intercourse. It is a bit of an outdated term. It got really popular when homosexuality was differentiated more than heterosexual sex.

Another Way To Look At Relationship Bases

As a grown and mature person, you can count relationship bases differently. Here are some quick terms you can think of.


One of the more important parts of a romantic relationship. Lust is strongest at the very beginning of the relationship. For many people, sexual attraction is one of the most important parts of romance.

You can feel lust for anyone you find attractive. You are simply driven by the evolutionary desire to have babies.



Grown people should consider their own boundaries before moving to anything physical. Think about the speed you want your love relationship to progress.


First base has always been and will always be kissing. We might add a few things, like below clothing touching, but first base is a hot makeup session. Kissing can range from innocent and quick to a full-on make-out session. The British call it snogging.

Kissing is the most important foundation of the relationship. A good kiss can cause our brain to release all those chemicals and hormones that make us happy.

Sensual Touch

Moving to second and third base, it is not just about grabbing your partner’s penis or tits. Hands start wandering as the chemistry increases and you build up your relationship. Now, innocent kissing quickly transitions to something raunchy and sassy.

And if you want to get sensual, there are many more erogenous zones than just the genitals. The non-genital erogenous zone includes ears, mouth, lips, neck, chest, nipples.


Getting Intimate

Teens might separate manual labor from oral. But adults know that these two things belong in the same category.

Getting intimate means you have crossed the threshold from touching to pleasuring yourself. And you can please someone with more than just sexual intercourse.

At this point, you are going to get undressed with the person you love.

Going All The Way

The last spot is the ultimate goal, and that is sex. Some couples wait for a few days, others do it on the first date, and some wait for months. It is important that both partners agree on when the ultimate act of sexual intimacy will come.

You want consensual penetrative sex, not some quickie.

Written by Steven

Steven is a young student from San Francisco who is obsessed with computers.

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